Saturday, March 16, 2013

Aweekstweets March 10-16 2013: the week I learned IBM labs are cloning the Jolly Green Giant

"NBC Executive and Leno Said to Have Clashed Over Jokes" ( JK--Understandably. Leno is the Lenny Bruce of our time.

Exhausting week was 60% on road. 1 speech, 1 podcast, 1 preso developed, 2 blogs written, 2 blogs published, 5 qhs, 1 tweetchat , 1 webinar

Submitted first post to my new monthly blog at InfoWorld: "Putting #BigData in the Cloud: Where to Start."

Ever notice that Republicans tend to accept gay marriage only when it turns out one of their kids is gay? Isn't simple human empathy enough?

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp The Same Thing by Cass McCombs from Humor Risk JK--Great song that sustains a burning intensity of feeling.

Is a Pope Emeritus infallible?

In my blog on in-memory, I break "speed of business" into speed of thought, of discovery, of transactions, of response, & of optimization

Fun evening shouting about technology in a noisy restaurant amid fine food and ample alcohol.

Drafted my next #IBM blog: "In-Memory: The Lightning in the #BigData Bottle"

"#IBM launches 'customer experience' practice" ( JK--Lab with IBM Researchers & IBM Business Analytics consultants

Facebook telling me it's somebody I've never heard of's birthday today. Perhaps this "friend" thing is being stretched beyond credulity.

New #IBm jk blog: "Hardcore #BigData Use Cases: Better Results at Extreme Scale" (

IBM's Silicon Valley Lab is only place in the valley where I can imagine the Jolly Green Giant feeling at home. Lovely farmland. Ho ho ho!

Drove briefly thru Stanford campus last night. Brought my head back to summer of 1976. My Uncle Jack took us there. He lived in Menlo Park.

"Xerox PARC Demo for Apple (1979)" ( JK--I drove to PARC last night. Just to see it from outside. Just because.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Memory Gospel by Moby from Play: The B Sides JK--I'm writing blog on in-memory architectures. So this sorta resonates

Burned tip o my right-hand index finger on coffee maker in my room. Have it on ice now. Damn burner heated up faster than expected. Blister!

#BigData hardcore use cases? Unstructured analytics ( Friday #IBM quick-hit in advance. I travel tomorrow

#BigData hardcore use cases? Behavioral analytics ( Thursday #IBM quick-hit

Sitting here quietly @ #IBM Foster City CA putting final touches on my preso on graph analysis 2 B delivered Mar 25 near home: Arlington VA

"Backups as a source for data mining" ( JK--Don't burden them with that secondary function. Mine the archive instead.

I like to learn from everybody.The first thing I often learn is who I in fact can't learn from. It's a learning experience.

"Algorithms Get Human Hand in Steering Web" ( JK--Mentions how #IBM #Watson leverages human judgment to tweak models

"#BigData Ethics: 4 principles to follow by organisations" ( JK--Transparency, simplicity, security, privacy.

My graying stubble makes me so damn distinguished. Definitely shaving it off. Grizzled isn't distinction I want. Have two presos tomorrow.

Holy smokes, Bullwinkle! A non-Italian with an Italian surname. Sounds like splitting the difference. Habemus consensus.

RT @TheSocialPitt: Thanks @ibmbigdata for the #bigdatamgmt chat! Very informative JK--+1 !!!!!!!!!!!!

@IBMbigdata A7: Always. Smartphones becoming the most ubiquitous, valuable source of ambient, geo, sentiment, & experience data #bigdatamgmt

@IBMbigdata A6: vehicle-sourced mobile data insights will help traffic planners dynamiclly optimize world transportation grids #bigdatamgmt

@IBMbigdata A6: wearable & implanted mobile devices will deliver unparalleled insights into wellness, health, & experience #bigdatamgmt

@IBMbigdata A6: mobile-gen data + data sourced from all other channels = fodder 4 dynamic multi-chann xperience optimization #bigdatamgmt

@IBMbigdata A6: mobile-sourced #bigdata fleshes out the "720-degree customer view" (external behavior + internal experiences) #bigdatamgmt

@IBMbigdata A6: deep machine-data analytics insights on geolocat, sentiment, behavior, and other signals sourced from mobiles #bigdatamgmt

@IBMbigdata A5: The mobile #bigdata environment should have SQL-query-virtualization front-end to simplify access #bigdatamgmt

@IBMbigdata A5: Need lower-latency in-motion #bigdata platforms closer to mobile client, batch & "data-at-rest" further #bigdatamgmt

@IBMbigdata A5: In-memory #bigdata clients/servers with back-end streaming best for real-time mobile #bigdatamgmt

@IBMbigdata A5: No particular back-end #bigdata platform preferred 4 mobile. Need front-end mobile access infra agnostic 2 all #bigdatamgmt

@IBMbigdata A4 Mobile #bigdata makes imperative 2 have enterprise rights mgmt policies 2 prevent multi-device over-retain/leak #bigdatamgmt

@IBMbigdata A4: Mobile doesn't impact retention policies at server--but should @ client. Keep sensitive info on device limited #bigdatamgmt

@IBMbigdata A3: privacy risks can B considerable, considering sheer comprehensiveness of personally identiable info in #bigdata #bigdatamgmt

@IBMbigdata A3: same risks as with any mobile data access: theft, loss, eavedropping...but MORE data is at risk with #bigdata #bigdatamgmt

@IBMbigdata A2: any data scientist or SME developing, collaboration, or tweaking statistical models from wherever #bigdatamgmt

@IBMbigdata A2: anybody who requires mobile access 2 decision support/automation powered by massive multistructured data sets #bigdatamgmt

@IBMbigdata A1: any app that aggregates & analyzes "ambient" data from smartphones & uses it to optimize mobile experience #bigdatamgmt

@IBMbigdata A1: Any enterprise decision automation initiative supporting mobile employees with analytic-powered apps #bigdata #bigdatamgmt

RT @IBMbigdata: Getting our panel together for #bigdatamgmt chat, Taking Your #BigData On the Road! #bigdatamgmt

Looking down on what appears 2 B Kansas. Thinking about vast open prairie of #bigdata being sown right now 4 fall harvest.Expect bumper crop

@mjcavaretta U bet! Fun fact: Livonia was into #bigdata before bigdata was cool. More bigdata per square mile than most suburban communities

Vatican should add a refreshing touch of burning incense to the eventual white smoke to give that extra note of sacred authenticity.

New #IBM blog: "Webinar Replay: Discovring Customer Insights @ Speed & Scale" ( JK--@graemeknows recap o Monday event

I'm mobile & aloft over #SmarterPlanet, which is powered by dynamic core of hot liquid #bigdata. Join #bigdatamgmt tweetchat at noon (EDT)

New jk #dataversity blog: "How Much #BigData Do You Actually Need?" ( #IBM

Catch me+others on #IBM tweetchat an hour from now on mobile #bigdata. Follow hashtag #bigdatamgmt. I'm tweeting mobile: from 35,000 feet.

Ironically some guy at the club today startled the hell out of me by blurting that I have the calmest face he'd ever seen on the elliptical

I'm a tad disappointed when I click an unfamiliar link and end up at something I wrote. Tell me something I hadn't already thought of, Jim!

March Madness underway at the Vatican. Clerics cagey about sharing the rankings. Winner gets a boss hat to flaunt around the basilica.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Naked by Sera Cahoone from Deer Creek Canyon JK--She produces drop-dead gorgeous folk-rock songs. Stir the soul.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Stoned and Starving by Parquet Courts JK--Singer has an epic case of the munchies.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Wings by HAERTS from Wings JK--One of my fave 2013 songs so far. Dreamy, romantic, high energy. Makes you feel good.

Hey #kexp @loserboy I'm still hearing your stream. All is not lost.

Somehow, unsolicited emails from "Oprah Whinfrey" promising we can "win free" stuff don't feel legit. Not sure why.

I like fact my actor-son lists "former vegetarian" under "skills" on CV. We paid his way thru drama school on condition he stay carnivorous

Papal conclave will commence shortly. I predict they'll pick an elderly, male, Catholic, ordained priest. I've been right every time.

"Use Cases for Decision Management" ( JK--Actually, decision criteria, not use cases.

WSJ "#BigData, Big Blunders" ( JK--Data infatuation, skills gap, misorganized, infighting, overkill.

WSJ "How #BigData Is Changing the Whole Equation for Business" ( JK--Lead story of yesterday's special section.

I laugh when somebody feels they must qualify "startup" with "young" "unproven" or "small." Redundant. Mature, proven, large = post-startup

"Unstructured Data Really Isn't" ( JK--Exactly! Question is: how much semantics explicit in data structure?

"Disrupting the university: near-term opprtnties in digital-learn mkt" ( JK--No, they don't mean occupying Admin bldg

"Why isn’t the future of work top of mind?" ( JK--IMHO Mayer illustrated irrelevance o central offices in new economy

Don't mean 2 cut you well-meaning Twitterati short, but yes, I've already seen & LOL'd at all those pics of me floating around out there.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Blues Run The Game by Nick Drake from Tanworth-in-Arden 1967/68 JK--Pretty quiet song on acoustic guitar. Demo tape.

#BigData hardcore use cases? Microsegmentation analytics ( Wednesday's #IBM quick-hit. I'm traveling tomorrow.

#BigData hardcore use cases? Whole-population analytics ( Tuesday's #IBM quick-hit

I think it'd be awesome if Henry Winkler could put the leathers & water skis back on & jump REALLY BIG shark. I'd pay good $ to see him fail

"In Multiscreen World, Context Is King" ( JK--Ad optimization must bind experiences cross-device into seamless msg

"Game Studios at Forefront of #BigData, Cloud" ( JK--Heavy-duty real-time steraming interaction analytics & response

"Seven dirty secrets of data visualization" ( JK--Not dirty at all. Very good guidelines w/ illustrations

"Can shared stor B used w/ #Hadoop arch?" ( JK--JBOD (just a bunch o disks)

"How's #Hadoop infrastructure improving?" ( JK--Discusses HDFS alternatives

@fatemehx2 "Big" & "right" aren't intrinsic to data either, nor is "smart." It's all in how you collect, manage, analyze, & use the stuff.

"OpenGroup panel explores how #Big Data challenges IT statusquo" ( JK--Apps exist 2 leverage data, not just create it

"Tame Risk with Smart Data, not #BigData" ( JK--Smart = right source, right sample, right statistical model.

WSJ article #bigdata article mistakenly calls graph analytics apps "graph theory" apps. Not theoretical. Actual, practical, proven tools.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Life's a Beach by Django Django from Django Django JK--Best double-D music sensation since Duran Duran & Dolly Parton

Spam informs of a "Booty call alert!" Are we mobilizing the National Guard? Should we stay indoors? Activate the Emergency Broadcast System?

#KEXP @loserboy Organ grinder?

 Retweeted by jameskobielus

Listening to Built to Spill "Mess With Time" in observance of Daylight Savings Time (

New #IBM Healthcare Analytics Software Helps Move Doctors to Predictive Medicine ( JK--IBM Patient Care & Insights

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Going to California by Led Zeppelin from ZoSo JK--Very Donovan.

In the era of #BigData, we should decree that the "next big thing" be at least 1000x bigger than the previous "next big thing."

RT @jay_henderson Join me today 12 est 4 Q&A re #BigData #MktgTech w/ @graemeknows, @jameskobielus & Anand Ghalsasi

#BigData discussions reach end of the line in cries 4 more definitions 2 split hairs, more Vs to beat into ground, & etymology of "Hadoop"

The day starts with me rushing myself, not me being rushed. Sounds like same thing, but it's not. Mental hygiene depends on it.

Every morning I recollect my thoughts from the previous day. Not hard. They're piled on my desk. I arrange them each to stare me in the face

WSJ has special section on #BigData today. Glanced at it quickly over breakfast. They did a good job explaining to a mass audience.

#BigData hardcore use cases? Better results at extreme scale ( Monday's #IBM quick-hit

When it's said that companies keep profits "offshore," I have a mental image of a money barge piled high somewhere out on the Sargasso Sea

Hey spammers please figure out I'm dude & my wife's a chick. I don't need Jennifer Aniston beauty secrets & she doesnt need testosterone fix

I've nevr found orig Mac or any descendnt easier 2 use thn Windows. What folks find easier 2 navig8 is Jobs fabld "reality distortion field"

Owls. What freaks us out are those intensely binocular predator eyes within round facial visage vaguely suggesting a human infant. A mad one

The answer is "Phish." The question is "Which apparently popular longtime cult jam band am I totally unfamiliar with?"

I've been doing Daylight Savings for more than 5 decades. With compounding, I now have enuff time saved to live into my 150s.

With Jobs' bio, one must constantly force oneself to distinguish btwn cool vs cruel. Stuff he accomplished vs crap he inflicted.

Seems like half the songs on the pop charts these days are one artist "featuring" another. Crosby Stills Nash & Young. Who featured whom?

LA Fitness has sign-up sheet for something called "Dwayne's House of Pain." I won't ask. And I won't submit.

Sportscasters tend to proclaim stuff the "greatest of all time" all the time. They should asterisk the claim with "idiotic hyperbole."