Saturday, June 27, 2015

Aweekstweets June 6-27 2015: the threeweek we sparked an impression

23 minutes ago
Listening to Maron's podcast with Obama. Reminds me of how fortunate we've been the past 6 years to have a level head in the Oval Office.

IBM, Box form extensive enterprise software alliance $IBM $BOX 

I must say I appreciate Donald Trump’s quadrennial efforts to put the bozo content of th Republican presidential campaign right over the top

Next week I resume my usual cadence of quick-hits, blogs, & stuff. Accent on the "stuff."

Tip 4 biz doing biz-to-consumer survey-followup-nag email: "Your feedback matters to us" (i.e. you) doesn't mean it matters to us (i.e., us)

"US Army Person-Event Data Environment" ( ) JK--To investigate psychological factor impacts on health outcomes

"BBC shows folly of ‘right to be forgotten’" ( ) JK--Agreed. It's crazy to imagine you can efface historical record

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp The Rainbow Connection by Kermit the Frog from The Muppet Movie JK--Amphibians are softies at heart. Case in point.

New York’s Lake George: A Living Lab for Solving the World’s Water Challenges 

Galvanize: hosts of the recent Spark Community Event and Hackathon in San Francisco.... 

"Fantasy Sports Betting: The Next 'Big Thing' Thanks to Big Data" ( ) JK--Um, no thanks. Next big money pit, perhaps.

I'm dismayd that Justice Scalia changed his position on jiggery-pokery. In my profssional opinion, it is firmly rooted in British common law

jameskobielus retweeted theCUBE
RT @jameskobielus: Monday of last week in downtown San Francisco
jameskobielus added,
theCUBE @theCUBE
@jameskobielus on @theCUBE discussing #IBM's big announcements about #spark … #SparkSummit

RT @ejacqui: Haha. I love tweeting and then forgetting about it completely for hours until I find myself puzzled at the replies.

Good night out. Indonesian restaurant food. Nearby. We’ve never been there. No point when we get better food at Indonesian parties

“Real housewives”? Concept is self-contradictory. All of these women have paying jobs outside the home: being “real housewives.”

Happy for the backlash against displays of the confederate flag. As a Virginian, I say “southern heritage--my rear end.” Slavery was sin.

"Biomimicry: Nature's Clues to Big Data Success" ( ) JK--Urges IT-archtctr focus on emulate what evolution hath wrought

Wrote all of next week's quick-hits. You must forgive me in advance. Plenty of overflow analyses around Spark. Must discharge them in batch

New #IBM jk #ITKnowledgeExchange column: "Spark as a fit-for-purpose big data component" ( )

I'm still not clear on what the old black was, much less the new. Still in the dark on that matter.

"In 1956, here’s how GM imagined self-driving car would work" ( ) JK--Require ctrl tower permssion 2 switch 2 that mode

Only appearance of Larry David in "Seinfeld." Unspeaking cameo as George Costanza's father's cape-wearing lawyer ( )

"Trough of Disillusionment." You know a technology is truly doomed when Gartner demotes from there to the "Valley of the Shadow of Death."

"Algorithms of the Mind" ( ) JK--Good piece about algos that "regenerate images corresponding to [a specific] concept"

He's being marketed for speaking engagements as "Coach Joe Gibbs." Apparently, it's an honorific that stays for life. Like "Pope Emeritus"

Borat. Every time I see someone citing that character, all I can think is they didn't see Baron Cohen's follow-up: "Bruno." Killed the buzz

North Korea survives on no rights, no food, no water, no electricity, no economy, & no hope. Should shorten country name to "No Korea."

"Unbeknownst." An ancient-sounding English word. Voicing it, I feel like I should be addressing King Arthur & the Knights of the Round Table

How brands can plan for the unexpected  #IBMCommerce

Turning an Unexpected Spike of Traffic into a Sales Opportunity  #IBMCommerce

A Wake Up Call for Brands: Surging, Always-On Consumers  #IBMCommerce

"Mass market." In physics, "mass" implies undifferentiatd matter exhibiting inertial resistance to influence. No market meets that criterion

"Chaotic Moon, IBM Watson Infer Audience Traits in Real Time" ( ) JK--Watson's Personality Insights capab. Way cool!

Chemical Brothers "Galvanize" ( ) JK--2005. Didn't hold back on June 15. Galvanized. Fingers on th #SparkInsight button

"A Look Back at Spark Summit 2015" ( ) JK--Good retrospective on Databricks blog.

"100 open source Big Data arch papers for data pros" ( ) JK--One should skim list to identify knowledge gaps, then read

"Spark DataFrames: Simple and Fast Analytics on Structured Data at Spark Summit 2015" ( ) JK--Good technical overview

"How artificial intelligence explains analytics" ( ) JK--Highlights Watson Paths visualizns to display Watson reasoning

"IBM & Box Forge Global Prtnrshp" ( ) JK--Includes integr8 insights from IBM Watson Analytics to content stored in Box

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp California Stars by Billy Bragg & Wilco from Mermaid Ave JK--1998. I craved that repose after recent Calif work trip

"Inceptionism: Going Deeper into Neural Networks" ( ) JK--Algorithmic computer-vision implement of believing = seeing

First beep of the morning reminds to mute laptop. Don't need work tool that taunts me like th Roadrunner or suggests bleeped-out profanities

Tasked myself with writing blog today. By "tasked," I jotted down a headline & scrounged up an article to react to. Let's see what develops

Fast dramatic slanting rainstorm pushed its way through here yesterday evening. Dropped the temperatures, if not the humidity. Fun to watch

My strategy is to stay proactively on top of everything everywhere all the time & retain the agility to abandon that strategy at any moment

Wasn't a bad day. Caught up on stuff. I'd already pretty much caught up on sleep. Not that I've been keeping a slumber ledger or anything.

"Would you live in a Nazi relic?" ( ) JK--Why not simply tear them down? They're historically offensive eyesores.

Fred Astaire dances in Alfred E Neuman mask in '59 TV special ( ). What...he worry about being klutz on 2 feet? Never!

Does anybody truly rest on their laurels? An evergreen shrub sounds like prickly upholstery, at best. Better wallow in mud, if comes to that

Drafted latest #Dataversity column: "CAPTCHA as CAPTCHA Can"

New #IBM jk #SparkInsight blog: "Spark and the crux of differentiation" ( )

New #IBM jk LinkedIn Pulse post: "Deep Learning & The Searchable Streaming Corpus" (  )

Beach Boys essential white suburban squareness always been fundamental to their appeal. Early recording of "Surfin'": 

Expected to be the hottest day of the year so far in the DC area. Not a concern during my work day, in my cool basement, but at night it is

Two simple reasons #IBM loves free software  via @businessinsider

Spark at the Center of a Technology Revolution 

Scale Effects, Machine Learning, and Spark 

With a Spark comes Power 

IBM Driving Spark into Real Time 

IBM Invests to Help Open-Source Big Data Software — and Itself 

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Orpheo Looks Back by Andrew Bird from Break It Yourself JK--2012. Very nice violin-driven square-dance vibe to this.
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" #IBM Delivers Docker Based Container Services for Enterprise Cloud Application Developers" ( ) JK--Key cloud infra.
IBM becomes the first reseller of the Docker Trusted Registry software  by @jordannovet

"Spark: An Open Source Revolution Comes to Big Data Analytics" ( ). Video from recent Spark Hackathon, SF #SparkInsight

New #IBM jk #InfoWorld column: "Algorithms for eyes: How deep learning can help the blind" ( )

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Life on Mars? by David Bowie from Hunky Dory JK--Suddenly noticed resemblance to Boomtown Rats "I Dont Like Mondays"

"Obama uses racial slur in intervu" ( ) JK--No he didnt. "Slur" is speech act: insulting. He cited a frequent slur word

I'd like to see a "For Dumbasses" series. Translate the "For Dummies" titles into snarky condescension. End every sentence with "duh!"

"Deep Learning Machine Beats Humans in IQ Test" ( ) JK--If so, whither the Turing test?

"Recent Evolution of Zero Data Loss Guarantee in Spark Streaming With Kafka" ( ) JK--Good "hardening Spark" discussion

"Reality check." Redundant phrase. When check arrives, money's real, no longer "in the mail." Or when it arrives, it's a real restaurant tab

"Spark update adds R support and machine learning chops" ( ) JK--Good overview of enhancements in Spark 1.4

"LinkedIn fills another SQL-on-Hadoop niche" ( ) JK--Pinot: Apache-licensed real-time analytics engine and datastore
"How Machine Learning Is Eating the Software World" ( ) JK--That's a defining trend of the cognitive systems era.

"Data science is still white hot, but nothing lasts forever" ( ) JK--Yeah & we're all gonna die some day. Happy Monday!

"Big Data Talent: 6 Ways To Snag The Best" ( ) JK--"Snag"? Like velcro on bramblebush? Why not just wangle more moolah?

Very little disappoints me. That's because I keep my appointments few & select. Must first appoint something before it can disappoint.

"Apache Spark: Powering apps on-premise and in the cloud" ( ) JK--Good post. Glad I met Ben Lorica @bigdata last week

"Spark Monitoring: Handle 10B Requests a Day" ( ) JK--Interesting discuss of Spark over Cassandra driving recomm engine

"Flying faster with Twitter Heron" ( ) JK--Twitter-developed real-time analytics plat fully API-compatible with Storm

"5 Reasons Apache Spark is the Swiss Army Knife of Big Data Analytics" ( ) JK--Good discussion by @VanRijmenam

"Architectural Patterns for Near Real-Time Data Processing w/ Hadoop" ( ) JK--Identifies use case for Spark Streaming

Getting behind on my reading makes me nervous. I never try to be more than a week behind. I catch up in batches.

"Fraud detection in retail with graph analysis" ( ) JK--Good discussion of traditional killer app for graph analytics

"Overfitting or generalized? Comparison of ML classifiers - a series of articles" ( ) JK--A textbook-grade resource!

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Janitor by Suburban Lawns JK-1981. Sounds like Yoko Ono singing "oh my genitals." I assume that's "janitor," right?

"The Internet of Things Transforms Transactions with Apache Spark" ( ) JK--Good outlining of Spark advantages in IoT

"‘Brain fingerprints': Will semantic memory ID replace fingerprints/passwords?" ( ) JK--More James Bond than practical

"Ray Kurzweil: Human brains could be connected to the cloud by 2030" ( ) JK--Or does he have his head in th clouds now?

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Ready, Able by Grizzly Bear from Veckatimest JK--2009. A song that sort of slinks into your lap & purrs contentedly

"7 Amazing Big Data Myths" ( ) JK--Unh unh. Sounds more like 7 amazing strawmen constructed by the author.

I'm often wary of the phrase "internationally recognized." Could easily be used to characterize a Seattlite with a buddy in Vancouver.

"How Sensor-Generated Data Enhances Your Data Warehouse's Value" ( ) JK--Discusses quality, security, & storage issues

"Introducing ShArc: Shot Arc Analysis" ( ) Jk--Video motion analytics applied to basketball trajectories.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Alberto Balsalm by Aphex Twin from ...I Care Because You Do JK--1995. Percussion sounds like tapping on metal railing

"The Internet of Things Will Give Rise To The Algorithm Economy" ( ) JK--Article includes ghastly coinage: "meshternet"

"SQL Will Inevitably Come To NoSQL Databases" ( ) JK--An issue that the industry has beaten to death. Alright, already.

"Spark & Storm face new competition 4 r-t Hdp processing" ( ) JK--Project Apex: OSS version of DataTorrent RTS's engine

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp I Scare Myself by Thomas Dolby from The Flat Earth JK--1984. Nice piece of jazzy pop.

Shocking Blue "Love Buzz" ( ) JK--1969. Flipside o "Venus." Didnt realize Nirvana's recording 20 years l8r was a cover

Hot one today. Longest day of the year, just to compound the misery. This scorching solstice already has me humming "Cruel Summer."

Publishers Clearinghouse. They generate "you may have won a million" emails by the boatload. Unsubscribe with extreme prejudice!

"Field of Dreams." That catchphrase remains transparently manipulative a quarter-century later. No, they won't come. Don't build it!

Tips and resources to help you get the most out of #dashDB:  #cloud #bluemix

Bummed that the most violent part of the thunderstorm moved thru here around 8. Hyperventilating weatherman on TV preempted my “Jeopardy!”

My daughter knew that her dear old dad loves Sno-Cap nonpareils. Great Father’s Day gift! Favorite movie theater munchie when I was a kid.

WSJ profile of Detroit describes it as "Michigan's once-glittering city." When exactly was that? Before it became polluted industrial zone?

People hung up on getting into or their kids into Ivy League universities. What's th big deal? I've met those grads. Smart, but not all that

Past 2 weeks in San Francisco/San Jose were an example of breaking through the 4th wall of social media marketing. Doing it live in-person

Spark and IBM InfoSphere Streams: Better Together …

New #IBM jk #SparkInsight blog: "Spark Summit 2015, Day 2: A gathering of today’s most dynamic data scientists" ( )

New #IBM jk #SparkInsight blog: "9 reasons why developers & data scientists are primed to spark insight with Spark" ( )

IBM Apache Spark Community Event - Lightning Talks ( ) Last Monday evening. San Francisco

Apache Spark Community Event - Spark Panel ( ). This past Monday evening. San Francisco. #SparkInsight

Had a wonderful 10 hours o deep sleep last night. I only experience that after exhausting road trips. I didnt work today. That felt good too

Reading WSJ profile of making of Dixie Cups “Chapel of Love.” Orig written for Crystals or Ronettes. Their inferior versions never released.

Limbaugh says Pope’s latest encyclical is call to vote Democratic. Necessary corrective after decades of being preached to vote Republican.

End of the week. Exactly where I want to be: on my sofa reading the newspapers my wife let pile up in my absence. And drinking lemonade.

Airplane diverted from Reagan National to Washington Dulles. Then a tornado hit Dulles. And I was already freaking exhausted to begin with.

I get exhausted just thinking about all the synonyms for “exhaustion” that I currently embody.

The core of San Francisco’s downtown feels very East Coast. But once you climb those hills, it’s anything but.

Stonebraker delivered a terrific reality check on Spark, in the context of Hadoop’s recent fast-track maturation. I am so glad he nailed it!

Now that a fair number of people I work with have seen me at some length in person, they realize I walk as fast as I talk & write.

My favorite meal in San Francisco? Something simple. A Tuesday special on tacos at some hole in the wall in North Beach. Spontaneous nosh.

The “gravy” moment in San Francisco was the very end. I’d always wanted to hear DB guru Michael Stonebraker. He didn’t disappoint. Brilliant

Highlight of my San Francisco sojourn? Popping out of the office late Tuesday afternoon, climbing stairs up to Coit Tower. Sun, air, view

Looking forward to walking my own neighborhood again after 2 weeks away. Contemplating the familiar again.

Wife mentioned North Carolina. That’s cool. I like our coast too. But Kitty Hawk fills up fast.

A good 30 degrees warmer at home where I’m headed than San Francisco where I left. Good to leave autumn behind. Summer is a-comin’ in!

Where I always complete my San Francisco trip: Perry’s at SFO, domestic terminal 1, near the Delta gates. Denver omelette. Breakfast.

Cogn cmptg? Analytic fuel propel humanity to cosmos p1:  p2:  Fri #IBM qh in adv. Chillin then

Machine learning? The mirage of completely machine-milled data science ( ) Thurs #IBM qh in adv. Travel day.

The Pacific Coast doesn’t get much more beautiful than right here at the Golden Gate National Recreation Area in San Francisco.

Meeting Michael Stonebraker at the Spark Technology Center. 425 Market St. Database industry legend. Winner of Turing Prize.

"IoT Transforms Transactions with Apache Spark" ( ) JK--Good balanced discussion of pros & cons of Spark for IoT

"Machine learning breakthrough could revolutionize medicine" ( ) JK--More fine-grained personalized metabolic profiing.

"To handle big data, shrink it" ( ) JK--Matrix condensation algo reduces data size, preserving mathematical properties.

"Data Virtualization Market is Strong" ( ) JK--Cites work of my #Forrester bud Noel Yuhanna. We used to team on this

They answered that question about whether they shoot horses, didn't they?

Geek in me is excited to ride elevator at 425 Market up with young data scientists on their way to work at new Spark Tech Ctr #SparkInsight

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Svefn-g-englar by Sigur Rós from Ágætis byrjun JK--1999. Elegy or epiphany? You decide. Regardless, it's a mystery

"3 reasons to run Spark in cloud" ( ) JK--Sign up now 4 #IBM Apache Spark as Service on Bluemix: 

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Red Clay Halo by Gillian Welch from Time (The Revelator) JK--2001. A perfect gem of Appalachian bluegrass/country

"IBM: Nurturing the Spark of Innovation" ( ) JK--Good analysis from @pund_it Charles King. Great to have U this week!

Skipping the quick-hits for next week. It's obvious what I've been doing 24x7 this week. Need a mental cooldown.

I could barely eat in peace at th Spark Summit a moment ago. Guy next to me saw my nametag asked "You the guy who organized that CrowdChat?"

How cold would San Francisco feel in the summer without the supposed “heat island effect”?

New #IBM jk #SparkInsight blog: "Spark Summit 2015, Day 1: Energizing a new wave of data scientists" ( )

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Susan by Aimee Mann from Bachelor No. 2 or the Last Remains of the Dodo JK--1999. She sings with plainspoken intimacy

The preferred noun form of "concise" is "concision." Truth be told, "conciseness" isn't as concise.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Dreams by Beck from the single JK-2015. New. Another great one from this guy.

Sleep is for wimps.

The sacred elephant and business value through enterprise Hadoop adoption 

#Spark fundamentally changes the types of questions that can be asked.  #SparkInsight

Big data = ability to achieve greater value through superior insights from analytics on data of greater volume velocity variety & veracity.

Data-scientist skillsets? Polymaths, prodigies, and tensions p1:  p2:  Wed #IBM qh

A few days ago I met a young data scientist whose given name is "Feynman." Talk about putting academic pressure on a kid from the start!

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Come To Your House by Bouquet from In A Dream JK--2015. Nice one. Trippy electronica. A bit like Broadcast.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp All Eyez on Me (feat. Big Syke) by 2Pac JK--1996. Good one from the long-departed rapper.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Crystals by Of Monsters and Men from Beneath The Skin JK--2015. Good new one. Catchy as hell.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Dancing at the Blue Lagoon by Cayucas JK--2015. Love the romantic samba shuffle of this. Dance floor seduction vibe.

San Franciscans really love their baseball. Good for them. I dig the newly built-up neighborhood around AT&T Park. Families having fun.

RT @dvellante: @jameskobielus can literally address 20-30 topics plus seemingly w/out taking breath #sparksummit 

RT @dvellante: Watching replay of @jameskobielus on #theCUBE - in-mem graph analytics machine learning #sparksummit 

Ben Horowitz at Spark Summit describes IBM as the “rabbi” that anointed Spark. Here I sit, the Roman Catholic embodiment of that rabbi.

Wearing my suit jacket for yet another day of a business-casual San Francisco tech conference. Not putting on airs. Simply staying warm.

New #IBM jk LinkedIn Pulse post: "Advertising Fatigue and The Analytics of Stealth Targeting" ( )

#Hadoop uber-alles? Tuning #ApacheSpark for maximum scalability p1:  p2:  Tues #IBM qh

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Hard Sun by Eddie Vedder from Into the Wild JK--2007. Like the late Jim Morrison, he has vocal swagger in his DNA.

Gearing up for Day 2 of #SparkSummit in SF. By "gearing up," I mean "decompressing my nervous system from yesterday's maximum compaction."

Oddest "influence" I've been recognized as having on socials: interior design (?!??). The only interior I care about is between my ears.

One of life’s greatest pleasures is emptying one’s pockets. Followed closely by filling them.

BTW, tomorrow's quick-hit is about "Project Tungsten." U think I'm not doing fresh analysis while in the midst of this #SparkInsight?

Check out the #SparkInsight tweetload today so far on @ibmbigdata: 

Today is the single busiest work day of my entire career. By "today," I mean "the past 2 months."

" #IBM and Spark: The start of something big in data and design" ( ) Video. #SparkInsight

RT @theCUBE: Live now on #theCUBE, James Kobielus, IBM. Join us at  #SparkSummit

Tune in now to #IBM theCUBE #SparkInsight streaming interviews …

On my way to # IBM partner Galvanize’s facility at 44 Tehama to kick off #SparkInsight community event. theCUBE streaming interviews

In San Francisco, jaywalking is more than justified by the need to avoid a ranting crazy person on the sidewalk in front of you

New #IBM jk #SparkInsight blog: "The Spark that ignites the insight economy" ( )

New #IBM jk #SparkInsight blog: "Spark delivering value in the real world here and now" ( )

New #IBM jk #SparkInsight blog: "The emergence of a diversified industry ecosystem around Spark" ( )

Teeny tiny typeface doesn't scale to legibility in front of a large room when it's still embedded in massive monochromatic glop o dense text

Yeah, we built the #SparkInsight buzz. When one's multifaceted announcement has ample substance & advances the market, it's not that hard.

"IBM makes cluster compute engine Apache Spark core to its cloud" ( ) JK--Spark as a Service on Bluemix. Coming soon.

Squatting here in the press room waiting for the opening keynotes at Spark Summit. Press room? Me? Sure, yeah: 

Spark as a Service on #IBM Bluemix. Sign up here: 

My Forrester blog from Dec 2011: #Hadoop + in-memory + graph DBs ( ). Was fairly clear something like Spark would come

Here's my first quick-hit to focus on Apache Spark in its own right, a year and 3 months ago: 

Here's my first quick-hit that mentions Spark, in passing, slightly < 2 years ago, in a stream computing context: 

If you're @ #SparkSummit this morning in SF, come hear @BethTSmith , IBM General Manager Analytics Platform, discuss our commitment to Spark

"IBM Wants to Push Spark..." ( ) JK--Spark as a service, cross-portfolio integ, open-source ML, etc

"IBM Invests to Help Open-Source Big Data Software — and Itself" ( ) JK--Interview with #IBM Analytics SVP Bob Picciano

"IBM Announces Major Commit 2 Advance Apache Spark, Calling it Potentially Most Signif Open Src Proj o Next Decade" ( )

Fun fact: I managed to write all of this week's quick-hits over the weekend while otherwise insanely work-busy in San Francisco.

Lyle Lovett "If I Had a Boat" ( ) JK--1987. Love how they worked this into "Still Alice" with Julianne Moore.

Apache Spark 1.4 was released this past week ( ). Includes alpha-level support for accessing Spark from R

jameskobielus retweeted Monica Fox
I'm along the far wall, in the middle, with bald spot. You can't miss me.
jameskobielus added,

#BigData is indeed rocket science. Check out NASA's 2015 technology roadmaps ( ). BTW, their logo? Still cool.

Ah yes, good ol' American plain yellow mustard on my poppy seed bagel. A culinary delight I picked up in the cafeteria at Holmes Jr High.

Glad the Embarcadero Starbucks has ample security-guard coverage close at hand. Nasty homeless person promptd quick response. God, he's back

I'm sorry, but after 40+ years "Dean Martin's Celebrity Roasts" now resemble the Las Vegas morgue. Every time those commercials play, I age.

"Do I contradict myself? Very well, then I contradict myself, I am large, I contain multitudes." --Walt Whitman (polishing his weasel-logic)

It's semi-mindblowing the resource that an #IBM can assemble in short order. "An.."? The!

Wikibon theCube at #HadoopSummit this past week ( ). Interviewed #IBM Joel Horwitz, Adriana Zubiri, & Anjul Bhambhri.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp The Specialist by The Heavenly States from HisS JK--2015. I like it. Actually, it thought it was LCD Soundsystem.

A hackathon is an intensely quiet affair. Rows upon rows o people staring intensely into screens, deep into their private coding conundrums.

Using music in my typical fashion: distract my mind while it ponders right POV on a complex technical topic. Writing next wk quick-hits

"Project Tungsten: Bringing Spark Closer to Bare Metal" ( ) Jk--Hope to meet the authors this week at Spark Summit. SF

I think "humongous" should be spelled "hhhhhhhuuuuuuuuuuuummmmmmoooooonnnnnngggggggggoooooooooooooooooouuuuuusssssss." Just to drive it home

Hey image-centric CAPTCHAs, don't ask us to identify the tigers. Ask to identify the endangered species. Cultivate respect for life on Earth

It doesn't scale! It doesn't scale! Who says it doesnt scale? That's what they said about dinosaurs, 4 crying out loud! Oh, you have a point

Listen close: "Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet consectetur adipiscing elit. Aliquam vel justo in lectus dictum feugiat interdum a dolor." Got it?

I myself am not a Spark developer, but I'm enjoying overhearing the discussions among coders at the Spark hackathon in SF right now. Osmosis

I don’t care what anyone says but I consider bacon to be quite delicious

San Francisco. Where one keeps a sweater close at hand, even when the sun is out on an almost-summer day. Reaching for mine yet again.

Yesterday I met Steve Hamm, IBM's Chief Storyteller ( ). As IBM's Big Data Evangelist, I now officially covet his title

USA Today revu of new bio has headline "Billy Martin: baseball's brawling bad boy." With all due respect, I remember him as a tiresome jerk.

Lord Huron "Louisa" ( ) JK-Starbucks on Embarcadero now playing this. Thank you! Iconic view of Ferry Bldg & Bay Bridge

God made San Francisco cool & windy so we won’t get overheated trying to climb its hills. Trust me on this. I have it on higher authority.

New #IBM jk #SparkInsight blog: "Hadoop Summit 2015, Day 3: Passing the torch to Apache Spark" ( )

Let's see. I wrote 5 blogs in the past 24 hours. And I got 5 hours of sleep. That's work-life balance for you.

Experience optimization? The zen of targeted inconspicuousness p1:  p2:  Fri #IBM quick-hit

New #IBM jk #SparkInsight blog: "Hadoop Summit 2015, Day 2: Managing Hadoop's indistinct market boundaries" ( )

Hey how about an elephant shooting sparks out of his trunk? Wait. Didn't Katy Perry do some pectoral variation of that in some music video?

I think they've saturated the "For Dummies" target audience. From what I hear, though, the "For Ventriloquists" demographic is underserved

I know the number of emails in my inbox is a finite integer. But why does likelihood I'll differentiate and integrate them feel imaginary?

New #IBM jk #SparkInsight blog: "Machine learning and the Spark of accelerated insight" ( )

Hdp uber-alles? New converged architctre o batch+streaming 4 Hadoop+Spark p1  p2  Thurs #IBM qh

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp I'm Kin by Colleen from Captain of None JK--2015. What is that? Some sort of electronic lute? Interesting sound.

New #IBM jk LinkedIn Pulse blog: "Things Within Things Within Things Within And In And In And In And…." ( )

RT @arianagradow: All hands on deck here @hadoopsummit to spread @IBMbigdata message. #@jameskobielus aka tweeting machine @theCUBE...

All hands on deck here @hadoopsummit to spread @IBMbigdata message. #@jameskobielus aka tweeting machine @theCUBE

The Jetsons era won’t arrive until we all change our last names to concocted words that suggest aerospace engineering.

Thinking of writing blog called "7 Big Data Myths to Die For" & another called "9 Big Data Myths That Go Surprisingly Well with White Wine"

"Business driver." Won't work. IBM would never approve me getting my own private work chauffeur. No approved vendors, for starters.

Ice cream history would’ve been very different if Häagen & Dazs had never met. But do they stand a chance against th Dippin Dots juggernaut?

New #IBM jk blog: "Building a strong foundation for Hadoop with the Open Data Platform initiative" ( )

New #IBM jk blog: "Hadoop Summit 2015, Day 1: Innovation thrives as Hadoop nears maturity" ( )

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp 1969 by The Stooges JK--Curious what Iggy found so boring about the end of the 60s. The one small step for man?

S&G "Mrs Robinson" ( ) JK--Upon their separation, who got custody o th dossier they were keeping on her: Paul or Artie?

New #InfoWorld #IBM jk column: "Humans vs. algorithms: Who -- or what -- should decide?" ( )

Interesting to drive Silicon Valley and see where specific vendors are HQ'd. All I can think is: "so that's what they see out their window."

"Apache Spark local livestream & reception" #SparkInsight Repondez s'il vous plait. Merci ( )

"Apache Spark and its application" ( ) #SparkInsight meetup a week from tomorrow. Moscow, Russia

Has anybody noticed I've been blogging on pretty much the same five-letter topic for the better part of a month now? Nobody? Whew!

New #IBM jk #SparkInsight blog: "Avoiding code bloat as data scientists embrace Spark" ( )

Day 2 at #HadoopSummit. Already looking forward to the after-party tonight in San Pedro Square. But first: 9 hours of tech discussions.

Data: The good, the bad and the ugly—and what you can do about it  #SparkInsight 

The Osmonds "One Bad Apple" ( ) JK--1970. Perfect example of Pat Boone-grade uber-white ripoff of African-American vibe

I appreciate the personal touch of a form email misfire that addresses me as "Hi XXX." My given name is indeed hardcore, adult, & explicit.

#Spark sparks imagination with #In-memory Graph & machine learning #analytics  #SparkInsight 

Practical applications for which #Spark sparkles brightly  #SparkInsight 

Best way to get the most out of data : Igniting interest in #Spark  #SparkInsight 

#Spark insights from the recent Cambridge meetup  #SparkInsight

How will data science shape the future of business? #ApacheSpark  #SparkInsight #ODP 

Data scientists need powerful #analytics solutions: Is #ApacheSpark th answer?  #SparkInsight 

What every data #analytics professional should know about #Spark  #SparkInsight 

Cognitive computing? Apache Spark in neuroscientific modeling applications ( ) Wednesday #IBM quick-hit

Lou Reed "Metal Machine Music" ( ) JK--1975. What "Finnegans Wake" was to unreadable, this shrieker was to unlistenable

A full breakfast plus a full lunch equals a full tank of energy for the 24-hour period in which they are consumed. Hence dinner needn't be

This "jobs 4 U" spam has gotten smart enough to tell me the hotel I'm currently staying in has a job for me. What is it? Making my own bed?

Big shout-out to Louis Cherian for a very successful #SparkInsight crowdchat. Our second. Even better than the first: 

New #IBM #SparkInsight jk blog: "Practical applications for which Spark sparkles brightly" ( )

Spark accelerates data scientist productivity because, like any open-source community, it facilit... #sparkinsight 

Speak of the devil, it's John Furrier directly across the table from me!!!! #sparkinsight 

Great to have you on the chat Ali! #sparkinsight 

Hi John. So am I. In the lobby near registration. All's a buzzin' with activity. Plenty of Spark ... #sparkinsight 

Hello everyone and welcome to the second of our crowdchat on Spark. #SparkInsight #sparkinsight 

I have my coffee, am powered up here at #HadoopSummit, and ready for #SparkInsight #Crowdchat: 

Decision scientists? Machine learning and the emergence of the algorithmic legal profession ( ) Tues #IBM quick-hit

First technical accomplishment at #hadoopsummit: helping @jameskobielus with the non-existing wifi password. #goodboyscout

Finally get to meet my fellow IBMER @jameskobielus after being connected on social media for so long #hadoopsummit

I'll be there. Join the conversation on #SparkInsight #ApacheSpark 

On the one hand, the coffee at the Delta Shuttle gate at DCA is free. On the other hand, it's undrinkable. Can't have everything, I guess.

I think "Weird Al" Yankovic should be awarded the Mark Twain Prize.

How is #Spark likely to evolve? Share your views in our next #SparkInsight #crowdchat on 6/9 

"Dusty in Memphis" has almost become my default "comfort food" in LPs to listen to from my collection. Feels real good in any moment.