Saturday, July 02, 2016

Aweekstweets May 20 to July 2 2016: the week I remembered I’d forgotten June

Give us an uncensored “Beetle Bailey.” I, for one, would like to know what curse words Sarge shouts at those “@#*!” soldiers.

What turkey is to Thanksgiving and ham to Easter, hot dogs are to the Fourth of July.

Exercise club very empty on this 3-day weekend. I suppose other members already have their beach bodies ship-shape and out being flaunted

The #AI Machines Undergoing Behavioral Psych Tests  #machinelearning #bigdata #datascience

Was a good week. Published my own original thinking several times. Because I could. Relieved to stretch my mind again.

Watching Jeopardy. Alex Trebek’s been host forever. The original, Art Fleming, left when he invented penicillin.

Funniest auto-correct error yet. It misinterpreted “thought leadership” as “f*ck your sh*t.” No joking.

In observance of Canada Day, here's some Yankee named Ed Sullivan praising Wayne & Shuster: . He showcased them often

"“Why doesn't Nicolas Cage give up & retire?” ( ) JK--Good Q, Quora. Why doesn't everybody count the days till death?

“If you see something, say something”? Can you be a bit more specific on both the visualization and vocalization ends of the equation?

RT @kexpplaylist Talking To Myself by Gallant from Ology JK--2016. Bit o' soul. I appreciate #kexp making this avai-buh-ble to the community

"The hidden risks of the bot explosion" ( ) JK--Trust requires bot transparency, accountability, honest expectations

"This AI learned to predict the future by watching loads of TV" ( ) JK--Did it also grow morbidly obese?

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Endless Supply by Rogue Wave from Delusions of Grand Fur JK-2016. Good new one. Their sound radiates grandeur.

"Infographic: The State of AI" ( ) JK--Good info. Would work better as an e-book or slideshare.

"New tool 4 virtual/augmentd reality uses deep learning" ( ) JK--Grasp th hand’s complexity o joint angles/contortions

"Human-in-the-loop deep learning will help drive autonomous cars" ( ) JK--Review/tag "corner cases" in training data

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Execution by ANOHNI from Hopelessness JK--2016. Sustains a musical feeling of levitation.

New #IBM jk LinkedIn Pulse post: "Drilling and Building: The Power Apps of Machine Learning" ( )

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Tinker Tailor Soldier Sailor Rich Man Poor Man Beg by Radiohead from A Moon Shaped Pool JK--2016. Orchestral morosity

"Highway That Will Produce Power Instead of Roadkill" ( ) JK--Solar-paneled roadway. Seems like a great idea anywhere.

New #IBM jk #TechTarget post: "Accentuating the positive vision of cognitive computing’s potential" ( )

Post-Brexit, it feels like David Cameron will rank right up there with Neville Chamberlain among British Prime Ministers who famously caved.

If the choice were food vs. music, I’d lean to the latter.

"How Machine Learning Is Eating the Software World" ( ) JK--It's the new app IP. Data scientists is new app developer

"Robots, AI Won't Destroy Jobs, Yet" ( ) JK--Reports Forrester survey results on the topic.

"Citizen Data Scientists" ( ) JK--From #TDWI's Fern Halper. I speak on this next month @ TDWI: 

"Auto-tuning" ( ) JK--Nothing to do w/singing off-key. Optimizing tunable machine learning pipeline "hyperparameters"

"Roaming Robots Reveal Real-time Retail Insights" ( ) JK--Deep learning to continuously tweak merchandising layout

Here are my recent thoughts relevant to today's 11am EDT #SparkFree Crowdchat.  Join us:

Join me 11am EDT today for live #SparkFree Crowdchat: "Bridging Enterprise Data to the Cloud"

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Perfect Day by Lou Reed from Transformer JK--1972. This song creep U out too? "You're gonna reap just what you sow"

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Atomic Number by case/lang/veirs from case/lang/veirs JK--2016. Nice soft 3-voice harmony on this one.

"Are We Smart Enough To Control AI?" ( ) JK--No. Hence, need institutional checks & balances in distributed governance

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Suzanne by Leonard Cohen from The Essential Leonard Cohen JK--1967. Judy Collins covered it almost immediately. Well.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Watching the Waiting by Wye Oak from Tween JK--2016. Loving this. Has a bit of a Clannad feel.

New #IBM jk LinkedIn Pulse post: "Big Data Tells Many Stories, Some of Them Spurious" ( )

New #IBM jk #InfoWorld column: "Advancing the art of the cognitive chatbot" ( )

Invest in Data Science or Get Left Behind Infographic 

"Complexity Science" ( ) JK--Complexity arises from adaptive iterations of agents following simple behavior rules

"New Machine Learning Cheat Sheet" ( ) JK--OK, but what's the deal with the emojis?

"Paper Explores How Evil AI Could Emerge" ( ) JK--Tries to discredit those who believe they're sensationalizing this.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Way Out There by Sons of the Pioneers JK--1937. I choose to believe pioneers sang this in 19th century wagon trains

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Me & Magdalena by The Monkees from Good Times! JK--2016. Written by Ben Gibbard. Voiced by Mike Nesmith. Awesome!

Did NASA fake the Moon landing? Perhaps. More damning, I have credible evidence that NASA has faked the existence of NASA from the beginning

Ach! Tired of "American Mutant Ninja Warrior." What else is on?

New #IBM jk LinkedIn Pulse post: "Deep Learning and the Deep Warping of the Photographic Record" ( )

New #IBM jk #Dataversity column: "Making Your Data Progressively Smarter" ( )

Fast-tracking Business Apps with Apache Spark Submit 

"Physicists Have Used a Quantum Computer to Simulate the Creation of Antimatter" ( ) JK--Scalable proof of concept

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Rebel Rebel by Seu Jorge frm Life Aquatic Studio Sessions JK--2005. Portuguese-language samba version o Bowie classic

"White House Announces Investing in ‘Sensor World’" ( ) JK--LA-based federally funded manufacturing research institute

"Bad Drivers Are About to Be Outed by Dashcam App" ( ) JK--Uses crowdsourced mobile/cloud app that scores such drivers

"Privacy Fundamentalists Are Worried About Smart Toothbrushes…Because Children" ( ) JK--Example of "technopanic"

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Route 66 (Get Your Kicks On) by The Cramps JK--1994. Today's the 31st anniv of removal of Rt 66 from US hwy system

Reviewing "great Saturday reading" that was flung my way over the weekend. For me, a great Saturday often involves respite from tech reading

"Stop. Using. Periods. Period." ( ) JK--Seriously, stop dictating punctuation at us. Have you nothing better to do?

"Gartner: Cloud will be the “default option” for software deployment by 2020" ( ) JK--2020? I'd say sooner.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp These Boots Are Made 4 Walking by Nancy Sinatra JK--1966. Implies naughty kicks both in th walking & being walked on

Summer lull is upon us. Specifically, Americans are drifting in their heads and vacation plans toward July 4. Week from now.

Expecting (and hoping) Clinton chooses our junior senator, Tim Kaine, as her running mate. Inspires no-BS confidence. He knows the levers.

“A Closer Look at COBIT COSO Frameworks” ( ) JK--A topic so boring you won’t even try to memorize it’s acronyms.

Hey, social communities that want me 2 repost my thought-leadership tweets on your sites: retweet them yourselves. Why would I work for you?

Chilling in the wilderness of Lake Accotink Park, smack dab in central Fairfax County.

"Visualizing Dynamic Bitcoin Patterns" ( ) JK--Annihilation of yr Bitcoin'd retiremnt savings resembles mushroom cloud

"Are Chief Storytelling Officers Just a Gimmick?" ( ) JK--Friendly advice: dont tell auditor yr job is "telling tales"

"Is Data Quality Stuck in th Dark Ages?" ( ) JK--Yes. Stuck somewhere in time warp btwn Charlemagne & Vlad the Impaler

Roger Miller "England Swings" ( ) JK--"Like a pendulum do."

Drafted latest #IBM jk #TechTarget column: "Accentuating The Positive Vision of Cognitive Computing’s Potential"

Financial is UK primary industry. Depends on openness w/internal realms (eg Scotland) & close allies (eg EU). Curious how this'll shake out

RIP Ralph Stanley. One of the legendary musicians you'd want to carve on the Mt. Rushmore of bluegrass music.

" #IBM Targets Developers with Powerful In-Memory Database in the Cloud" ( ) JK--DB2 v11.1. Bridge on-premise to cloud

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Ain’t No Man by The Avett Brothers from True Sadness JK--Excellent new one from the North Carolinians. A Billboard #1

Drafted new #IBM jk #InfoWorld column: "Advancing the Art of the Cognitive Chatbot"

Join me et al on #PredictiveEverywhere Crowdchat "Mitigate risk and fraud" Thurs July 7 11am EDT. Register:

#IBM #Watson AI XPRIZE competition open for registration. For more information, and to register to compete, visit 

"How to Hire a Good Data Scientist & Avoid Fake Ones" (  ) JK--Good advice, bad headline. It's competency, not honesty

"Return Visit 2 MacroEcon" ( ) JK--Scratchng my head over this "left v right wing" analogy re stat-inference orthodoxy

"HDFS: Big data analytics' weakest link" ( ) JK--Not "as fast efficient or easy to operate as should be" sez @acoliver

"New Masters: AI Software Has Painterly Technique Down Pat" ( ) JK--If that ML model decays, is it "ex-pat"?

"We’ve All Dated This One Person" ( ) JK--Yep. Everybody has hooked up with a Kilimanjaro-climbing yurt aficionado.

"Can Elon Musk make a robot maid a reality?" ( ) JK--Ah yes. To die on Mars with a robotic mistress. Every man's dream

"Torrential rainfall that turned Metro stop into waterfall" ( ) JK--Real culprit: adjacent parking lot's plugged drain

People of the UK are also voting on the issue of whether to pronounce it "breck-sit" or "bregg-zit." Huge stakes in that one.

RT @kexpplaylist#kexp Wappen Beggars by Pity Sex frm White Hot Moon JK--2016. Ann Arbor group. I would've settled for bandname in my A2 days

Las Vegas gets a pro hockey team. Longtime dream of all those Vegas kids who practice passing the puck all winter on their backyard rinks.

RT @kexpplaylist#kexp Time Tells Me by Pony Time from Rumours 2: The Rumours Are True JK--2015. Has a straight-ahead garage-rock vibe.

Exercise is good 4 U. You got biceps? Man, I got triceps quadriceps even quinticeps. And I ain’t gonna tell you what I use my sexticeps for

Drafted new #IBM jk #Dataversity column: "Making Your Data Progressively Smarter"

"Bot Design Patterns" ( ) JK--Notifiers, Reactors, Space Reactors, Responders, Space Responders, and Conversationists

"Sunspring, a 9-minute-long sci-fi movie written entirely by AI" ( ) JK--Starring an actor from "Silicon Valley"

"MIT AI predicts when people will kiss hug or shake hands" ( ) JK--Can it assess your chances with looker across room?

"AI for Vehicles Is Entering the Speed Lane" ( ) JK--And ensures drowsy driver doesn't drift into oncoming traffic.

New #IBM jk #TechTarget column: "Eliciting high-quality data science from non-traditional sources" ( )

"IBM Unveils New Bluemix OpenWhisk Tools to Speed Dev o IoT Apps on IBM Cloud" ( ) JK--Rapidly build event-driven apps

Drafted my latest #IBM jk #TechTarget #ITKnowledgeExchange column: Eliciting High-Quality Data Science From Non-Traditional Sources

#ibmwow call for speakers ends Friday 6/24! You can do it. We believe in you. #cognitive 

We want to hear from you! #ibmwow call for speakers closes 6/24. Share your expertise in the #cognitive era. 

Awesome set of download/playback links to sessions at recent #SparkSummit ( ). I was there, but couldn't do everything

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Day Is Dawning by The Hidden Cameras from The Smell of Our Own JK--2003. Really sounds like it's being sung at dawn.

Learn about advances in security, availability & performance available with DB2 v11 -  #security #DB2v11

Read about the easy to consume IBM #DB2 Direct editions available with DB2 V11 for Linux, UNIX and Windows-  #DB2v11

#DB2v11- Exciting developments with advanced SQL and in-memory BLU acceleration.Read article for details-  #analytics

Accelerating Analytics for the Big Data era with #DB2v11. Check out this article -   #DB2v11 #bigdata #analytics

The value of common database tools and linked processes for Db2, DevOps, and #Cloud -   #DB2v11

Great tips for migrating a DB2 #database from a Big Endian environment to a Little Endian environment   #DB2v11

A DB2 release that doubles down on data protection! Good article on security enhancements with #DB2v11  #bigdata

A great 1 min video which explains the IBM #BLU MPP technology in #DB2v11 -  #analytics

IBM's The Weather Company partners with GoGo for real-time turbulence reports 

Cloud-based ingestion: The future is here 

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Whirling Eye by The Kills from Ash & Ice JK--2016. Great song. Really grabs you. "Get the vision"!

"IBM & Acxiom Plan to Help Data Scientists Use Analytics to Obtain Customers and Prospects with Greater Accuracy" ( )

"DARPA wants to design an army of automated data scientists" ( ) JK--Actually, it's to empower citizen data scientists

Exact instant o Summer Solstice. I assume that all Druids at Stonehenge are busily henging stones. Can henge 10 times their weight in stones

Summer solstice. Longest day of the year here in the northern hemisphere. Feels like it will never end. And that's a good thing.

"AI, ML Drive Autonomous Vehicle Dev ( ) JK--Unit shipments of vehicular AI systems expected to rise to 122M by 2025

"Algo Learns 2 Transfrm HandDrawn Sketches Into Photoreal Images" ( ) JK--Let's rev-eng fotos from historical sketches

"What does your smart car know about you?" ( ) JK--Good one. Check out the slide preso: 

"What’s so ‘BIG’ about Big data?" ( ) JK--Fun fact: it's 10x bigger when you spell "BIG" in all caps!

"A Flying UAV Drone Full of Sensors" ( ) JK--Cool pictorial on how grad students in Poland built theirs.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp TAQOMA by Damien Jurado from Visions of Us On the Land JK--2016. He sings this in an otherworldly sort of drawl.

Webcast: Unleash the power of predictive analytics to mitigate risk and fraud 

Introducing notebooks: A power tool for data scientists 

"Stephen Colbert takes net neutrality for a whirl" ( ) JK--Term was NOT coined in 2003. Was in FCC debates in late 80s

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Female Vampire by Jenny Hval from Blood Bitch JK--2016. Norwegian artist. Ambient disembodied ethereal.

Monday morning spam whose subject line is my name. Thanks. I tend to forget stuff like that over the weekend. Good to be reminded.

Father’s Day out with my daughter (and her Mom)

Avoiding air turbulence may soon get easier 

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Sixteen Tons by Johnnie Taylor JK--Great commentary in yesterday's WSJ on T.E. Ford's version

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Long Walk to D.C. by The Staple Singers JK--For me, it's 12 miles due north. I've never walked it. I-395.

"IBM and Gogo join to help pilots avoid turbulence" JK--Great idea. Sort of a Waze for the airways.

Very pleasant weather on this Father’s Day morning. I’ll let the wife & daughter sleep in. Dads need peace and quiet sometimes.

Having trouble remembering who exactly was popular in highschool 40 years ago. Having trouble remembering why being "popular" was important

Went 2 weeks with only sporadic exercise. Two business trips intervened. But my body felt all put together in this morning's yoga.

Developed my "citizen data scientist" preso in spite of pushback from others. Developed my "smart data" preso over my own original pushback.

Still not using Internet of Things in my personal life. Still relying on my natural sensors. Still using my wits & digits to grasp things

Relaxing contemplating what does and doesn’t matter. My usual background rumination.

My “smart data” dimensions: scalable, fast, comprehensive, relevant, curated, contextual, predictive, cognitive, consumable.

It's fitting that Father's Day falls on Summer's cusp. Kids know it's usually best to leave us Dads alone to laze in our mental hammocks.

Reason I'm always talking is I take the dictum "if you see something, say something" to heart. I move through the world with eyes wide open

IBM Developed a Molecule That Uses a Triple-Attack Technique to Fight Off Viruses 

How Cognitive Computing Can Drive Sustainability This Summer 

Moving From Weather Forecasting To Problem Solving As Hurricane Season Begins 

I'm gonna tell ya, UK, if ya Brexit, ya gotta Pay4it!

Data curation is hot. I prefer my data slowly curated for weeks over a mesquite flame. Makes the most awesome data jerky!

Whew! Internal workshop is over. Now I can afford to let my hair down. That bouffant I was sporting was unsustainable.

Today is 6-16-16. That’s the mark of the devil cleaved by the Twin Towers stabbed by daggers. It’s right there in Nostradamus. Look it up.

Whenever a movie ad says “critics are raving,” I’d like to add the word “lunatics” to that.

Everybody in marketing says their solution will change everything forever. Forever's too long. I'd like the option of changing it all back.

The power of machine learning in Spark 

Lovin’ the Sixth Street club scene in Austin. Great bands, no cover charges, no cover versions.

Austin feeling kind of mellow tonight. I’ve adapted to the heat and humidity. Enjoying the walk in an old working class neighborhood.

Spam stokes my self-esteem. It's good to know that, no matter how unbelievable the emailed offer might be, I'm pre-qualified.

Funnel cloud ( ): a cloud service that drives an unambiguous call to action of considerable value: flee for your life

Catch my talk, "Citizen Data Scientists in the Era of Self-Service Analytics" ( ). July 19. 4:45pm EDT. #IBM #TDWI

Catch my keynote “The Evolution of Big Data to Smart Data” July 13, 11:30am EDT  #IBM #Dataversity

Smart Data Online 2016  via @sharethis

Finished my slides for the Dataversity and TDWI keynotes I'm doing in July. Not half-bad, either of them. Still stewing on them, though.

O. Henry's home is just a block away from Hilton Austin. Reminds of this SCTV bit ( ). Spoiler alert: eaten by a lion!

Was chatting the other day with Doris Day, Dolores DeLay, and Dora Del Rey. None of us had a whole lot to say. What the hey.

Email from "Peter Smith" with subject line "From Peter Smith." I know it's spam. If it were legit, would say "From the desk of Peter Smith"

Andrea Braida and me #selfie #nwom

Top analytics tools in 2016 

Another scorcher in central Texas today. I assume most Texans cook their eggs on the sidewalk. The place is frying-pan flat enough for that.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Memory Gospel by Moby from Play: The B Sides JK--2000. Oddly inspirational for a song that says nothing but "hey."

Must be careful not to spill my coffee. Not a good idea to mess with Texas.

Join me Wed 6-29, 11am ET on CrowdChat "Bridging enterprise data to the cloud" Login at  . #SparkFree #CloudantFree

"How new AI fools humans into thinking artificial sounds are real" ( ) JK--Machine learning analysis of audio patterns

Preview release of Apache Spark 2.0 ( )

Recap of last week's San Francisco #SparkSummit by Databricks with slides, keynotes, etc. ( )

"Bursting Gartner’s 'Algorithm Economy' Bubble" ( ) JK--Narrow the scope to "predictive algorithm" and it's valid.

"How Big Data Demoted Pluto" ( ) JK--Oh, get off it! What you gonna do? Tell little kids big data killed Santa Claus?

"Researchers Outfit Lake Superior With Sensors to Measure Riptide" ( ) JK--Coldest swim I ever took was in Superior.

"A method to image black holes" ( ) JK--Extraordinarily complex machine-learning composite from many signal sources.

"Outta My Way! How Will We Translate Self-Driving Honks?" ( ) JK--Calibrate to cultures? Indonesians honk in a dialect

"What Can You Do with a Career in Data Science? -- Infographics" ( ) JK--Good stats, but a bit much for an infographic

"Barbell effect of machine learning" ( ) JK--I disagree w/thesis of asymmetric ownership: ML v data. Both going public

"Kinetic Artwork that Sorts Thousands of Random River Stones by Age" ( ) JK--Hmm. Beautiful idea, beautifully realized

In hot/humid conditions, many advise you to hydrate. But I'm oldschool. I prefer to simply drink water.

"Mathematicians R chronically lost/confused (& that’s how it’s supposed 2 B)" ( ) JK--Groping for patterns in the dark

"Why does Bill Gates look so old?" ( ) JK--Typical dumb Quora question. You realize he's 60, don't you?

Flying to ostentatious Austin, Texas.

Terms of endearment are not in and of themselves endearing. Quite the opposite. Isn’t that so, smugglebuns?

Reading about the supposed horrors of office cubicles. Furniture isn’t the issue. Distraction from adjacent humans is what stinks.

Watch this video to see how IBM #DB2 on Cloud can unlock transformative insights hidden within your data -  #cloud

The wait is almost over! #DB2v11 will be released next week.  Check out our new-look web page -  #bigdata #cloud

Why use DB2 v11.1? Check out the key highlights in the Data Sheet "IBM DB2: Your bridge to the cloud"  #cloud #DB2v11

Is your database ready for the #Cognitive Era?  Read this executive brochure for details-  #DB2 #DB2v11

Transition to the #cloud your way with the new release of #IBM DB2 for Linux, UNIX and Windows -   #DB2v11

New #IBM jk #SparkBizApps listicle: "How can data scientists collaborate to build better business applications?" ( )

Old highschool acquaintance reaches back out of the blue to ask if our '76 graduating class is having a 40th anniversary reunion. Dunno.

Annoys me when some people spray down the white foam in the Jacuzzi. Hey! That’s my whipped cream you’re zapping!

Picking fights on social media is a bit like arguing that the shopper ahead of U has one item more than allowed in the express lane. Petty.

It seems somehow fitting to lose both Ali and Gordie a week apart. Both were tough-as-nails sports icons of astonishing prowess.

My Gordie Howe autograph. Circa 1973. I was just a screaming teenage fan at Olympia Stadium. Cherished possession.

I tend to stick with old habits long after they've lost any functional necessity. Like ripping interesting articles from mags. Never to read

Want to thank invited influencers for coming to Apache Spark Maker Community Event this week in SF. I interviewed all. Video will post soon

When there's a unopened bottle of beer and it's not twist-off, it's amazing how fast the mind sees potential openers in every nook & cranny

RIP Gordie Howe. One of my cherished childhood memories was getting his autograph after a Red Wings game at Olympia Stadium. Still have it.

Good mental habits are th sinew of soul muscle. They give you the tensile strength to bend in every weather, fend for yourself thru whatever

Nice to relax over breakfast on a quiet cool June morning back East. San Francisco was fun, but it’s no Northern Virginia.

My sense of #sparksummit is that it’s morphing into a general-scope data science summit focused on streaming, graph, & machine learning.

At the start & immediate aftermath of business trips, I often forget to reset my default printer. My print jobs land 1000s of miles away

Egidia and I are chilling in San Francisco. Tourist stuff. I’ve been working strenuously. Unwinding in the winds of Ghirardelli Square.

Geek biology has evolved to adapt to their natural habitat, able to extract all life-sustaining nutrients from black coffee & stale bagels

New #IBM jk #SparkBizApps #SparkSummit blog: "Apache Spark Maker Community Event" ( )

Rob Thomas #IBM #SparkSummit #SparkBizApps keynote "Shifting Data Science Into High Gear w/Analytics OS" preso:

Rob Thomas #IBM #SparkSummit keynote "Shifting Data Science Into High Gear w/Analytics OS" preso:  #SparkBizApps

Sanders wins caucuses, which R Democratic regulars but not superdelegates, who are also Dem regulars. Which regulars R your regulars, Bern?

New #IBM #Bluemix jk #SparkBizApps blog: "Open Data Science Innovation in the Cloud" ( )

Me #IBM on #theCUBE at Apache Spark Maker Community Event #SparkBizApps #IBM #SparkSummit #Spark

Ryan says Trump racist but will still vote for him. Let's remind ourselves how Hitler used the electoral system to seize power in Germany.

New #IBM jk #SparkBizApps blog: "Experiencing deeper productivity in open data science" ( )

"IBM Launches Industry’s 1st Integrated Developmt Environmt for Apache Spark, Delivered in Cloud 4 Rapid Adoption" ( )

"Google Developing Panic Button To Kill Rogue AI" ( ) JK--Oh really? What do you do when your panic button goes rogue?

"The truth behind AI, machine learning, & bots" ( ) JK--You'll soon realize human attention/action still indispensable

"Unethical Research: How to Create a Malevolent Artificial Intelligence" ( ) JK--As if we needed Lucifer's cookbook

"Want to Win at Kaggle? Pay Attention to Your Ensembles " ( ) JK--Diverse predictive models converging on solutions.

"Why scientists want robots to learn to feel pain" ( ) JK--IMHO, first teach them to feel love & loss.

"DARPA wants 2 find vital limitations o machine learning" ( ) JK--How generalizable are learning algos across domains?

"Apache Spark as Compiler: Joining Billion Rows/Sec on Laptop" ( ) JK--Tungsten deep dive at this week's Spark Summit

"This Week in Hadoop and More: Heron, Hadoop, Parsey McParseface, Calcite" ( ) JK--Goofy open-source names abound!

"Walk This Way: Let Your Shoes Tell U Where To Go" ( ) JK--Vibrating tootsies? Can they also soothe your barking dogs?

"Money managers seek AI ‘deep learning’" ( ) JK--"Net effect is arguably the closest a machine has come to intuition"

Getting ready for Apache Spark Maker Community Event today ( ). By "getting ready," I mean already ready #SparkBizApps

My feeling is you shouldn’t call yourself a geek unless you’re prepared to go thru life saying “geek geek geek” like a deranged waterfowl

It's high time Francis Ford Coppola filmed a sequel. I'd suggest a more life-affirming premise. Call it "Apocalypse Now, Apocalypse Wow!"

Thinking of keeping tabs on all the predictions I've made in the past, selectively promote the prescient ones, cultivate a Nostradamus image

Hey Facebook face recognition: by this time you should have figured out that I'm not Dan Kobielus. We're not twins. He's 3+ years my junior.

I've walked a broad circuit of downtown San Francisco 2 days straight, starting up Filbert Steps to Coit Tower each time. Wife in tow th 2nd

Dim sum in Chinatown. Sim dum in Tina Chown.

The only Muhammad Ali stories I have are 2nd-hand. My wife met him on a DC street. A guy I knew in college was target o fake pulld Ali punch

Coyotes recently seen at Coit Tower. Those must be tough urban varmints, indeed!

Walking San Francisco on Saturday morning. Listening to Led Zeppelin. Restores the elasticity to my walking muscles. Got a whole lotta love

RIP Muhammad Ali. Boxing legend’s principled refusal of Army induction galvanized anti-Vietnam War cause in US mainstream

We have a fairly packed schedule for the Monday event here down at Galvanize SoMa. Been a logistical challenge.

Wife seems surprised that San Francisco can be pretty chilly. We actually did honeymoon here. I’m pretty sure she remembers THAT.

401(k). I think the tax code should be amended so that when the balance you've stashed hits $401, it's automatically boosted to $401K.

Everything you think you know about AI is wrong  via @washingtonpost #IBM

Having married a stubborn east Asian lady has made me a harder bargainer than I normally would have been. We're definitely a pair.

Is your hardware #storage running efficiently? Store more w/ #IBMSDS 

King Tut. How’d he get so funky?

Want to thank Suranto+Kay for passing thru NoVa & hanging with us briefly. Also want to thank Suranto for an awesomely relaxing pro massage

Conspiring w/friends Kay & Suranto to double-couple a Whistler BC time-share in October. We all dig the Pacific Northwest. Seattle/Vancouver

New #IBM jk #Galvanize #SparkBizApps blog: "The Rise of Open Data Science. Join Us June 6th ( )

Download Chik-fil-A's mobile app to get one free sandwich? Not sure I need the crapware. Not crazy about their food. Or their politics.

"Everythng U Need 2 Know bout Poop" ( ) JK--Great lead sentence: "Suddenly it seems like we're all talking about poop"

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Midas Tongue by Sam Beam & Jesca Hoop from Love Letter For Fire JK--2016. Nice new collab featuring Mr. Iron&Wine

"IBM Speeds High Performance Data Analytics w/Sw-Def Infra Tech" ( ) JK--Intelligent mgt of open analytics resources

Hey medical establishment: stop telling us our test results are "negative" when you mean "good." Why suggest even a split-second of anxiety?

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Moon by Beth Orton from Kidsticks JK--2016. Nice. Ruminative and restless. Always her best mood.

Gonna need a list to keep track of all the lists of things I need to keep track of. Listlessness just doesn't do it for me.

I've substantially completed my preso on Citizen Data Scientists for TDWI Boston, July 19. Topic seems to irk some longtime data scientists

Packing for a week in San Francisco. Spark Spark Spark Spark Spark! Work work work work work work!

Tropical Storm Bonnie? Fortunately, she lies over the ocean.

I’ve decided I don’t like bacon-flavored chocolate. Just feels like it’s staining my palate, not pleasing. Too many earthy notes.

Boosting Productivity of the Next-Generation Data Scientist: IBM June 6 event … via @kdnuggets

#KEXP @loserboy got request from Jakarta listener needing offset to insanity o "24M-person city jammed with traffic on a steamy evening"

What is Business Intelligence? How BI drives better decisions -@IBMAnalytics  #YouShouldKnow

New #IBM jk blog on partner #Platfora site: "What is Business Intelligence?" ( )

New #IBM jk #Dataversity column: "Don’t Fence Me In: Tensions on the Data Science Frontier" ( )

"TV industry will unravel faster than U think" ( ) JK--Declining viewership will tip growth to video-centric socials

Boosting Productivity of the Next-Generation Data Scientist: IBM June 6 event … via @kdnuggets

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp You Bring The Summer by The Monkees from Good Times! JK--2016. PreFabs collab with XTC's Andy Partridge. Perfect!

New #IBM jk #SparkBizApps blog: "Innovative business applications: The disruptive potential of open data science" ( )

Protect the Integrity of the Public Purse 

Thanks Strata + Hadoop World for sending me Chinese-language promo for your Beijing conference. Reminds me to learn Mandarin in my sparetime

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Like a Ship by Pastor T.L. Barrett and the Youth from Like a Ship (Without a Sail) JK--1971. Thrilling gospel choir

Breakfast isn't the most important meal of the day. But breakfast time is most important time. Many minute prep steps get U up & on your way

Spent late afternoon on much-overdue yardwork. Got the vegetation clipped and tidy. Drained my muscles of all energy. Exhausted exhilaration

Verizon Reaches Tentative Deal With Unions to End Strike -  - mobile.nytimes.comssrUysdaa

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Good Times by The Monkees from Good Times! JK--2016. Great new rock and roll from Micky, Mike, & Peter.

Got a good memory workout watching the Monaco Formula One Grand Prix on the TV at the fitness club. I walked those streets in fall 2004.

Speaking at Dataversity and TDWI events in July. One virtual, one physical. Savoir faire is everywhere!

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Mixtape by Chance The Rapper from Coloring Book JK--2016. Spacy rap. Rhymes “pico de gallo” with “cinco de Mayo”

I like "ctrl-alt-delete" cuz it puts control at the forefront. Quite frankly, it's those uncontrollable alt-deletes that give me the jitters

Loading up on Memorial Day lethargy. I think we’re well-stocked on that account.

Facebook’s newsfeed algo specializes in generating stories of type “[such-and-such] could change everything forever.” I see several each day

“Complimentary fitness assessment.” Free gym club benefit where a personal trainer tells U you’d benefit from paying for a personal trainer

Being “of a certain age.” My birth certificate doesn’t allow any margin of error. Yes, I’m certain.

“You get what you pay for” doesn’t explain “buy one get one free.” Where’s a Nobel Prize winning economist when you need one?

I'm a bit tired of referring to a generation of people abstractly as "Millennials." Instead, I'll name each of them Millie, Lenny, or Niles.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp A.M. AM by Damien Jurado from Visions of Us On the Land JK--2016. He builds these awesome atmospheres of deep feeling

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Late Bloomer by Jenny Lewis from The Voyager JK--2014. Jenny is a great melodicist. This one hits you deep.

Join #IBM mentors June 4-5 @Galvanize for #Spark makers build #SparkBizApps 

What are u doing June 4-5? #hackathon #Spark @galvanize #SparkBizApps #IBM mentors available 

The New Builders Ep. 6: Apache Big Data & ApacheCon Roundup, Pt. 2 - Inside 3 Apache... 

"Why AI personalization is pathetic" ( ) JK--Author peeved at being stalked by ad-bots asking for repeat purchase.

"Spark 2.0 prepares to catch fire" ( ) JK--Unified data model. Session support. Structured streaming. Perf enhcmt. Etc

"For Big Data, Party Time is Over" ( ) JK--Not so fast! Not until we've played pin the tail on the elephant!

"Data being ‘hoarded,’ not commercialized" ( ) JK--Is someone hoarding metaphors other than "data=oil"? Release them!

"If It Bleeds, It Leads: Understanding Fear-Based Media" ( ) JK--"Managing depression requires U mind yr media intake"

"Algorithms clickworkers, & befuddled fury around Facebook Trends" ( ) JK--FB should go with "if it bleeds, it leads"

AirBnB open-sources Aerosolve machine-learning library ( ). Optimized 4 crunching sparse geo/search/pricing data sets

"Massive hidden shift driving companies to use AI bots inside FB Messenger" ( ) JK--Ubiquitous 24x7 social Turing test

"Animal training techniques teach robots new tricks" ( ) JK--Bots take predictive cues from feedback speed & frequency

"Questioning the Lambda Architecture" ( ) JK--Caveats urge against prematurely lionizing Lambda.

"Lab Failures Turn to Gold in Search 4 New Materials" ( ) JK--Swizzle in some machine learning to form new hypotheses

"Is predictive analytics really a game changer?" ( ) JK--OMG! Enough about "Moneyball" already!

"Big Data’s 'Streetlight Effect'" ( ) JK--WEIRDO-skewed data: Western Educated Industrialized Rich Democratic Online

"5 Telltale Signs You Don't Understand Big Data" ( ) JK--No. 6 is your tendency to compare its magnitude to a breadbox

"Obama might call Kalorama home — just like these five presidents before him" ( ) JK--I love walking those streets

"All of our clocks are wrong" ( ) JK--US should reset atomic clocks to 1950s standard: Howdy Doody Time.

"US govt agencies still using Windows 3.1, floppy disks & 1970s computers" ( ) JK--Should donate it all to Smithsonian

RT @kexpplaylist 6 Inch (feat. the Weeknd) by Beyonce from Lemonade JK--2016. Another great new one from the bootylicious megastar.

Let's see. What other crazy crap is going on in the universe outside my narrow narcissistic little niche in it all? Oh dear! Sorry I asked.

Drafted latest #IBM #InfoWorld column: "Big Data Tells Many Stories, Some of Them Spurious"

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Face by Kristin Kontrol JK--2016. Gr8 new band/pseudonym from Dum Dum Girls leader (aka Dee Dee, aka Kristin Welchez)

Memorial Day coming up. We should rename it Leisure Day. That way, Summer would be book-ended fittingly by holidays to Leisure & Labor.

"Something big is on the horizon for data science" ( ). #SparkBizApps. Register for June 6:

"Lean data science w/Apache Spark" ( ) JK--#SparkBizApps blog by @galvanize Aaron Merlob. Reg:

Join me in 20 minutes on #SparkBizApps CrowdChat: Open analytics and data science:

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Walk On by Corinne Bailey Rae from The Heart Speaks... JK--2016. Very nice. Soulful. Deeply relaxing liquid groove.

"A shift away from big data" ( ) JK--Nope. Ref retaining less PII, not downscaling analytics

Usually, questions on Quora are superfluous--eg, "Is Daniel Radcliffe a good actor?" Asking in this way implies you've prejudged the answer

"Secret sauce." This Quora post says Jack In The Box popularized phrase in early 70s ( ). That's my recollection too.

Catch #IBM (incl me) at Apache Spark Maker Build, Apache Spark Maker Community Event, and Spark Summit West. All SF. June 5-8. #SparkBizApps

Every morning is an effort to remember things I deliberately forgot when I put away my work thoughts last evening. I leave plenty of clues.

I’m still not sure why all good people turned their heads each day. Because they were so satisfied he was on his way? Or cuz he’s seen them?

CrowdChat: Open analytics and data science. Join me tomorrow at 11am ET: … #SparkBizApps

Not sure why I'm getting offer to subscribe to New York Post. I live near DC. Even when in NYC, I avoid it like doggy doo on the sidewalks

Drafted latest #IBM #Dataversity jk column: "Don’t Fence Me In: Tensions on the Data Science Frontier"

InsightOut: The case for open metadata and governance 

New #IBM jk #SparkBizApps blog: "Boosting the productivity of the next-generation data scientist" ( )

The Monkees "She Makes Me Laugh" ( ) JK--2016. Yes, new release. Great one. Written by Weezer's Rivers Cuomo.

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp (Just Like) Starting Over by John Lennon & Yoko Ono from Double Fantasy JK--1980. Has feel of a 1950s nostalgia song

Many fitness instructors at Northern Virginia gyms are military wives working side jobs. They drill bootcamp into our sorry suburban hides.

New #IBM #SparkFree #CloudantFree #DB2Free jk slide preso: "Bridging to a hybrid cloud data services architecture" ( )

"An Open Source Tour de Force at Apache: Big Data 2016" ( ) JK--Dizzying range of projects underway at ASF.

"Supercomputing Helping Clean Up Waste From WWII" ( ) JK--Simulating how to safely handle radioactive H-bomb residue.

"World's 1st artificially intelligent lawyer just hired @ law firm" ( ) JK--Did they give it an artificial conscience?

Switching back & forth among timezones to schedule meetings. I mistakenly restore my own Eastern zone to "Easter Island." Like a blockhead

"Fighting the Zika virus with the power of supercomputing" ( ) JK--International proj using IBM's World Community Grid

"5 Q’s For Dr. Jacob Vogelstein, Prog Mgr IARPA" ( ) JK--Discusses proj to “reverse engineer algorithms of the brain”

"The Maker of Things" ( ) JK--Engrossing discussion of arduous human ingenuity of megaprojects pre-20th century

RT @kexpplaylist #kexp Sorry You're Sick by Ted Hawkins from Suffer No More JK--1982. Immediately grabs. Re-released on Rhino in '98.

What is text analytics? 

"How Technology Hijacks People’s Minds — from a Magician and Google’s Design Ethicist" ( ) JK--Very astute discussion

Everybody says I should go on "Jeopardy!" By the same token, I should also win the Powerball.

My wife made an interesting aural observation last night. She said Fred Armisen sounds like Woody Allen. She's right.

Rainy Sunday. We indulged in America's pastime: sitting inside complaining about how depressing a rainy Sunday can be.

Saw new “Captain America” in the theater with daughter. Superheroes team to defy laws of physics and plot coherence. Otherwise, entertaining

Radio programmrs are out o touch. “Washington’s best variety o th 80s 90s & today.” Since when is the better part th past 2 decades “today?”

We should all age like wine. Growing better, not bitter.